The LSQ Movie Review's Reviewed Movies

At the LSQ Movie Review, we review movies. Well, we talk about movies. We're not professionals (although Hey Zeus tries to be). But we do have opinions and have relatable tastes. We're the average moviegoer.

Here, we offer a complete compendium of every rating The LSCrew has given to the movies they've talked about on the show. Each member of the LSCrew uses a different grading system to rate the movies they see and they all make sense in their own way (except for Schwez's, which makes no sense at all). Also, after every rating, you'll find the episode in which they talk about that movie.

Hey Zeus, always a traditionalist, uses one of the simplest to understand grading systems amongst the LSCrew: a scale of F to A.
The A-Team: B - Episode 28 - Cowboy Morpheus
Alice in Wonderland: A- - Episode 16 - It was Like Robocop, Kinda...
Avatar: A- - Episode 6 - An Army of Teddy Ruxpins
The Book of Eli: C- - Episode 9 - Stress-Induced Suicide
Boondock Saints: C - Episode 18 - That's a Lot of Testicles
Brooklyn's Finest: D+ - Episode 16 - It was Like Robocop, Kinda...
Clash of the Titans: B - Episode 20 - Jebediah the Kraken
Cop Out: B+ - Episode 15 - Joe's Making Sounds Like a Zombie
The Crazies: B- - Episode 15 - Joe's Making Sounds Like a Zombie
Daybreakers: C- - Episode 8 - Why Do All the Problems Drop from the Sky?
Edge of Darkness: B - Episode 11 - The British Use Kilobeans
From Paris with Love: C+ - Episode 12 - Tuesdays of the Dead
Get Him to the Greek: B- - Episode 28 - Cowboy Morpheus
Green Zone: C+ - Episode 17 - Days of Storm
Hot Tub Time Machine: A- - Episode 20 - Jebediah the Kraken
Iron Man 2: B - Episode 24 - Hulk Splash
Jonah Hex: C- - Episode 28 - Cowboy Morpheus
Kick Ass: A- - Episode 21 - Exaggerated Maleness
The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters: A - Episode 18 - That's a Lot of Testicles
Legion: D - Episode 10 - Garden of Edenville Dinertown
The Losers: B+ - Episode 22 - Decoder Rings and Snap Bracelets
A Nightmare on Elm Street: B- - Episode 23 - W.W.H.L.D.W.H.G.H.W.T.I.
MacGruber: B - Episode 26 - I Like Dinosaurs and Cameras
Ninja Assassin: F - Episode 3 - Loose and Greasy
Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time: B+ - Episode 27 - I'm Not Getting into This Goddamn Intro
Repo Men: B - Episode 18 - That's a Lot of Testicles
Robin Hood: A - Episode 25 - Copyright Infringement
Sherlock Holmes: A - Episode 7 - Everybody Loves Snatch
She's Out of My League: B+ - Episode 17 - Days of Storm
Toy Story 3: B - Episode 28 - Cowboy Morpheus
Welcome to Colinwood: A- - Episode 18 - That's a Lot of Testicles
The Wolfman: B- - Episode 13 - Helmets and Short-Buses
Youth in Revolt: C - Episode 8 - Why Do All the Problems Drop from the Sky?

Joe also uses a simple system, but in his case it's because he couldn't think of a better one to use: 0 to 5 stars.
The A-Team: 4 stars - Episode 28 - Cowboy Morpheus
Avatar: 5 stars - Episode 6 - An Army of Teddy Ruxpins
The Book of Eli: 4 stars - Episode 9 - Stress-Induced Suicide
Boondock Saints: 5 stars - Episode 18 - That's a Lot of Testicles
Boondock Saints: All Saints Day: 5 stars - Episode 18 - That's a Lot of Testicles
Clash of the Titans: 3 stars - Episode 20 - Jebediah the Kraken
The Crazies: 3 stars - Episode 15 - Joe's Making Sounds Like a Zombie 
Daybreakers: 3 stars - Episode 8 - Why Do All the Problems Drop from the Sky?
Edge of Darkness: 3 stars - Episode 11 - The British Use Kilobeans 
From Paris with Love: 4 stars - Episode 12 - Tuesdays of the Dead
Get Him to the Greek: 4 stars - Episode 28 - Cowboy Morpheus
Green Zone: 3 stars - Episode 17 - Days of Storm
Hot Tub Time Machine: 3 stars - Episode 20 - Jebediah the Kraken
Iron Man 2: 4 stars - Episode 24 - Hulk Splash
Jonah Hex: 2 stars - Episode 28 - Cowboy Morpheus
Kick Ass: 3 stars - Episode 21 - Exaggerated Maleness
The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters: 5 stars - Episode 18 - That's a Lot of Testicles
Legion: 3 stars - Episode 10 - Garden of Edenville Dinertown
The Losers: 3.5 stars - Episode 22 - Decoder Rings and Snap Bracelets
MacGruber: 2 stars - Episode 26 - I Like Dinosaurs and Cameras
A Nightmare on Elm Street: 3 stars - Episode 23 - W.W.H.L.D.W.H.G.H.W.T.I.
Ninja Assassin: 3 stars - Episode 3 - Loose and Greasy
Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time: 3.75 stars - Episode 27 - I'm Not Getting into This Goddamn Intro
Sherlock Holmes: 4 stars - Episode 7 - Everybody Loves Snatch
She's Out of My League: 4 stars - Episode 17 - Days of Storm
Robin Hood: 4 stars - Episode 25 - Copyright Infringement
Youth in Revolt: 5 stars - Episode 8 - Why Do All the Problems Drop from the Sky?

Cory's system is equal parts simple and difficult. Simple to understand, but difficult for him to come up with each week. He gives out between 0 and 10 random, funny objects/references to the movie he's rating.
Alice in Wonderland: 5 out of 10 Frabjous Days - Episode 16 - It was Like Robocop, Kinda...
Avatar: 10 out of 10 "Billie Jean" grasses - Episode 6 - An Army of Teddy Ruxpins
The Book of Eli: 7 out of 10 pierced dead cats - Episode 9 - Stress-Induced Suicide
Boondock Saints: 9 out of 10 toilets dropped on the head - Episode 18 - That's a Lot of Testicles
Clash of the Titans: 5 out of 10 Ultrazords - Episode 20 - Jebediah the Kraken
Cop Out: 6 out of 10 penises drawn in fog on a one-mirror by Bruce Willis into an interrogatee's mouth - Episode 15 - Joe's Making Sounds Like a Zombie
The Crazies: 7.5 out of 10 Olyphant Mans - Episode 15 - Joe's Making Sounds Like a Zombie
Daybreakers: 7.5 out of 10 Sam Neills - Episode 8 - Why Do All the Problems Drop from the Sky?
Edge of Darkness: 39 out of 50 millicurries of thalium (tha's a standard scale, muthafucka)- Episode 11 - The British Use Kilobeans
From Paris with Love: 6.5 out of 10 Hosses - Episode 12 - Tuesdays of the Dead
Green Zone: 5.5 out of 10 Jacks of clubs - Episode 17 - Days of Storm
Hard Candy: 7.2 out of 10 testicles - Episode 18 - That's a Lot of Testicles
Hot Tub Time Machine: 9 out of 10 shoe beatings - Episode 20 - Jebediah the Kraken
Iron Man 2: 9 out of 10 super suits - Episode 24 - Hulk Splash
Kick Ass: 6.5 out of 10 scuba suits - Episode 21 - Exaggerated Maleness
The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters: 10 out of 10 barrels - Episode 18 - That's a Lot of Testicles
Legion: 3 out of 10 shorties - Episode 10 - Garden of Edenville Dinertown
The Losers: 16.5 out of 18 shooters within the next 12 hours - Episode 22 - Decoder Rings and Snap Bracelets
A Nightmare on Elm Street: 6.2 out of 10 molested chidldren - Episode 23 - W.W.H.L.D.W.H.G.H.W.T.I.
Ninja Assassin: 3 out of 10 knuckle sandwiches - Episode 3 - Loose and Greasy
Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time: 8.1 out of 10 (big time) bass slaps - Episode 27 - I'm Not Getting into This Goddamn Intro
Robin Hood: 6 out of 10 fake Fauxleys - Episode 25 - Copyright Fringement
Sherlock Holmes: 6 out of 10 Guy Ritchies - Episode 7 - Everybody Loves Snatch
She's Out of My League: 7.5 out of 10 pairs of cum-stained pants - Episode 17 - Days of Storm

Schwez made his system up on the spot during the recording of episode three, and didn't fully explain how his system worked until episode nine (and again in 13, and once more in 17). Basically, there are a total of five "bouse" possible for the movie to achieve, and a single "bouse" can be broken up into five "deece". So, a movie that gets 4 bouse and 1 deece is the equivalent of a 4.2 out of 5.
The A-Team: 4 bouse, 3 deece - Episode 28 - Cowboy Morpheus
Alice in Wonderland: 3 bouse - Episode 16 - It was Like Robocop, Kinda...
Avatar: 5 bouse - Episode 6 - An Army of Teddy Ruxpins
The Book of Eli: 4 bouse, 4 deece - Episode 9 - Stress-Induced Suicide
Boondock Saints: 5 bouse - Episode 18 - That's a Lot of Testicles
Boondock Saints: All Saints Day: 5 bouse - Episode 18 - That's a Lot of Testicles
Brooklyn's Finest: 3 bouse, 1 deece - Episode 16 - It was Like Robocop, Kinda...
Clash of the Titans: 4 bouse, 3 deece - Episode 20 - Jebediah the Kraken
Cop Out: 3 bouse - Episode 15 - Joe's Making Sounds Like a Zombie
The Crazies: 4 bouse, 2 deece - Episode 15 - Joe's Making Sounds Like a Zombie
Daybreakers: 3 bouse, 3 deece - Episode 8 - Why Do All the Problems Drop from the Sky?
Edge of Darkness: 4 bouse - Episode 11 - The British Use Kilobeans
Get Him to the Greek: 4 bouse, 4 deece - Episode 28 - Cowboy Morpheus
Green Zone: 3 bouse, 3 deece - Episode 17 - Days of Storm
Hard Candy: 4 bouse, 3 deece - Episode 18 - That's a Lot of Testicles
Hot Tub Time Machine: 3 bouse, 3 deece - Episode 20 - Jebediah the Kraken
Iron Man 2: 5 bouse - Episode 24 - Hulk Splash
Kick Ass: 4 bouse, 4 deece - Episode 21 - Exaggerated Maleness
The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters: 4 bouse, 3 deece - Episode 18 - That's a Lot of Testicles
The Losers: 4 bouse - Episode 22 - Decoder Rings and Snap Bracelets
MacGruber: 3 bouse, 4 deece - Episode 26 - I Like Dinosaurs and Cameras
Ninja Assassin: 4 bouse, 1 deece - Episode 3 - Loose and Greasy 
Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time: 4 bouse, 2 deece - Episode 27 - I'm Not Getting into This Goddamn Intro
Repo Men: 4 bouse - Episode 19 - Prince Fantastic
Robin Hood: 3 bouse, 4.5 deece - Episode 25 - Copyright Fringement
Sherlock Holmes: 4 bouse, 1 deece - Episode 7 - Everybody Loves Snatch
She's Out of My League: 4 bouse, 1 deece - Episode 17 - Days of Storm
Toy Story: 4 bouse, 2 deece - Episode 28 - Cowboy Morpheus
Welcome to Colinwood: 3 bouse, 4 deece - Episode 18 - That's a Lot of Testicles
The Wolfman: 3 bouse, 3 deece - Episode 13 - Helmets and Short-Buses
Youth in Revolt: 3 bouse, 3 deece - Episode 8 - Why Do All the Problems Drop from the Sky?

DJ the Intern also uses a numerical system, but not a base-ten standard. Any random number will do.
Sherlock Holmes: 43 out of 57 - Episode 7 - Everybody Loves Snatch